Today was a hard day. An emotional roller coaster. Very difficult, because I am being pressed, under some type of test. And I know that's whats happening, that I just have to maintain the faith and keep my composure, but as deadline's loom near, and the dinero es muy pequeno, it is getting difficult for me to stay focused.
Leading me to ponder, without pity partying. Why is this life so difficult for some, so easy for others. Yeah, I know that what I think is easy may not really be, but its hard for me to swallow that a peer with mommy, daddy, a million in the bank, and every financial concern covered could ever understand me and my childhood of lettuce sandwiches until that teachers salary kicked in September 18. Or me now, trying to stretch each inspiration like a thin rubberband, thinning until it finally bursts. Tryin to make a dent, a mark, without losing ground. And it is not an easy. It is never easy. There is never a connection, a family tie, someone who knows someone, nada....
At the end of the day, the cliches always seem to fit my life. But, hell, how many trials are necessary to pressure this rock into a diamond?
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About Me
- a.Kai
- Calm and peaceful, or panicked and angry. My emotions run the gamut. Check out what I'm going through, and gain some insight to what I'm writing and why.
4 comments:
Big hug, 'cuz you need one!
To some extent you are right. Others may not understand your life's issues and challenges, just as you don't understand theirs. Don't ever forget that money doesn't make folks happy. It does, however, make one comfortable and able to raise the focus to other things.
Hang in there. Whatever you're dealing with, know that God is faithful and that it will pass. (This from the lady whose family was homeless earlier this year.)
You are a diamond. I've known you along time, you have always been a diamond. You just don't seem to know it. Brush off that dirt and shine. Everyone has trials, granted some are worse than others but believe me there are so many people that had it or have it worse than you. Keep fighting your reward is on it's way!
Patricia, I can't tell you how much that means.. thank you. genuinely, thanks. Tryin to keep my family protected and covered, physically and mentally, is exhausting. And you know of what I speak...
Anonymous - I have to figure out who you are!! Such sweet comment, thank you...
My goodness! How do you know you're not already a diamond? They don't come out of the ground shiny and bright, ya know? They are dull, having spent their lives so far in the muck, deep in the earth. But polish them up, give them the attention they deserve, and they simply sparkle. That's what this blog and your poetry and your fiction are doing for you - bringing the diamond to light. Keep at it. Remember, there is no stronger substance than a diamond.
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