Sunday, December 23, 2007

4 no no's

I have been writing reviews for a long while now. For the past few months for Rawsistaz reviewers. I really enjoy it - and I am getting to read some fantastic pieces. Some. I noticed when I first began reviewing two years ago, some stuff is just.....not good. And, what do you say? I mean, it is subjective, who am I to tell someone that their work isn't good because it doesn't appeal to me. But, well, it's more than just not appealing to me. Some stuff is actually....bad. Poorly written (BTW-ignore my typos while I criticize, please). Not well thought out. Definitely not realistic. The problem with self publishing is that some folks just shouldn't write novels. Self publishing gives an open forum to everyone, which was necessary because the publishing industry was restrictively biased. But, some of the "Black literature" that I have read is so bad that I can't help but cringe.

Instead of outing folks in what is not their best product, I comment in a positive light. But these are a few pet peeves that I have noticed and I think listing them here will at least make me feel a little better, like screaming into a pillow in the back of a closet!

1. THERE IS NEVER A SMOKING GUN. This is a basic principle I learned in law school, I would just like to share it with my fellow authors. The person who cheats doesn't leave a list of their cheating discretion on the dining room table. The real babie's daddy doesn't get a blood test and then announce the results to complete strangers. The stalker doesn't leave a diary full of his tricks. Why is this necessary to point out? To date over 3/4 of the books I review build up great suspense. Then in one chapter the entire story is discovered and fixed, because the perpetrator tells on themselves. It is disappointing and shatters the mystique of the story.

2. NO MORE FRIENDS TURNED INSPECTOR GADGET. The first point leads to this second one. I don't want to read 1 more book where the best friend dons a weave/wig, ala Samantha from Sex and the City, seduces a stranger, tape records him confessing the entire truth, and then gets home just in time to fix dinner for her man. Do I really need to expound on this point? Doesn't it just seem wrong, highly unlikely, and a book turner off-er(made up word)? Then stop doing this in the novels!

3. A CREATIVE BEGINNING. Now this point is one in which I am hesitant to raise. The last ten novels, no exaggeration, started off the EXACT SAME WAY. Good hard working sistah, dating gold toothed, jheri curl having, no job working "Tyrone" type. He gets caught cheating with (fill in the blank here- gay lover, white woman, another woman, his hand, etc...)Then our heroine begins her story. Now, I get why this is the starting point. But since so many people seem to start here, it is advisable to find a different intro. When readers are browsing in the bookstore - if they are anything like me, and unfortunately for them many are- they will read the first two pages and shut the book. I can spend two hours in the bookstore and walk away empty handed by performing the "no good black men in the first chapter" test on any given day.

4. END THE BOOK. Dayum! Do I really need to tell someone that? I have no idea who started this "Ima set the reader up to buy a sequel" trend, but trust me, it doesn't work. The only thing it does is buy you a place on my "never buy one of their books again" authors list. Listen, if JK Rowling can finish (as in completely complete) a biblical sized book on an annual basis and create enough curiosity to bring back millions of readers, then why on earth can't a simple book about Black love and relationship do the same? If you want to bring me back, give me closure. Give me deeper characters with whom I can grow, whose maturity is something I want to experience. DO NOT build up a whole "who is she pregnant by plot," which by its very nature is pathetic anyway, and then end the book. Do you really think I am going to wait a year to find out? Do you really think I care that much? Do you really think you have somehow lured me in? Guess what, when I have recognized ghetto madness and stick with the book anyway, the least you can give me is an answer. Some finality. Something instead of the frustrating realization that the novel was a complete waste of my time.

5. MOST BEAUTIFULLEST. This point I am a little less adamant about. This is just a "hmmm?" moment. Why does every woman and every man have to be perfect in their presentation. The woman has the perfect body, not an inch out of place, not an extra pound anywhere to be found. Thong ready and stiletto perfect. Every man over 6 feet, picture perfect fine, six pack for days, a sexual stud. Really? Why? Why wouldn't some of these characters represent the many shades and sizes of us. I don't get it. Black woman who are overweight are making our heroines the perfect woman we have never been nor do we know. Black woman the color of deep chocolate are writing heroines that are no darker than Beyonce. I want to spit up everytime I see another "caramel skinned/green/grey eye character." Now, it is fiction. Therefore, the characters shouldn't look like the author. I just don't understand why I have read so many books by so many different sized woman of color with different complexions and hair lengths/textures, yet the main character is always the same. I guess we don't really believe that we are all that beautiful in our multiplicity, as evidenced by how we portray us, huh? We are perpetuating the "brown paper bag test" and the perfect body stigma more than any other culture ever forced it on us...


Wheeeeew. Thank you for letting me vent. Now, I will reel my emotions back in and attempt to offer my best opinion possible. And I will try not to slam down/burn/tear/destroy any more compilations of paper that lead me in an endless chase, like a puppy nipping at her tail...

Monday, December 17, 2007

I Am Legend

Will Smith just blew me away. Literally. He is on the next level of acting, of presenting...I can't explain it. I loved I Am Legend. First off, I am a sci fi head, so this type of movie is right up my alley. Secondly, it is based on a premise that is plausible. A scientist cures cancer, but the cure causes a mutated virus. Of course. Killing off 99% of the population. Of the 1% left alive, only 1% is immune, the rest become this rabid, cannibalized version of humans, feeding off of the immune and everything else. Will is trying to find a cure, constructing for himself a daily routine to keep his sanity (he hasn't seen a another normal human in years) and remain hidden from the mutants who overtake the city at night.

The movie drew me in. The complete normalness of his day against the stark emptiness of Manhattan was stunning. Few actors can carry a movie without much dialogue. I think it is narrowed down to Jodie Foster and Tom Hanks to be exact. But Will did it. In rare, touching form. I haven't been this consumed by a flick and all the questions it raises, since the original Matrix, which was initially offered to Will (instead of Keanu) and he turned it down to do that Western Flick (i can't think of the name)- proof that he is not perfect. Unlike that body of his which filled the screen nicely, during a workout/pull up scene for a beautiful full minute.

But anyway, I applaud him for this film. Sally Richardson plays his wife, his beautiful daughter Willow plays, uh, his daughter. But the film is so good you can even forgive the blatant nepotism.

I heard people complaining that they wanted a little more action although everyone is unanimous that Will blew it away with his acting. But I loved the simplicity of the scenes, underscored by the pure terror of trying to survive day in and day out. I am going to buy the book immediately.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Succesful Webcast...

THank you so much for tuning in. My first webcast was successful and, I have to tell you, I feel relieved. It was like the debutante ball, the first time my voice has been associated with my writing on a national scale. I have to thank Pam Osbey and Osbey Books, Inc. for this phenomenal experience. I think the show went very well, Pam asked wonderful questions and kept the energy of the show alive.

Feel free to click on the link below to hear the podcast, which will be available for the next two weeks....
LITERARY PIZZAZZ

Tune in at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/literarypizzazz or click link above...

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Tidbits - December

Christmas is approaching and, like every year, I reminisce on the ones I have loved and lost. I have no idea why Christmas always makes me feel melancholy, but I have the same reaction every year.

Recently, an old friend returned to my world. I knew him before I even knew myself. Not that I know myself actually, but I have a little more of a clue than I had then. We were kids together, now adults together. Isn't it odd how life works, how someone from your childhood could still be such an important part of your life. It's given me reason to reflect and think about the many years I have known him and how much life has changed for both of us...

We recently went to West Point to take my son a football visit. A once in a life time experience. But military academy means making that commitment. It's a rare opportunity, but its coupled with the inherent dangers of war. The reality of war. And while I have had a family member fight, serve, participate in every war back to the Civil War (although some of them weren't allowed a weapon/ or to participate in combat)its a different thing to sign up your child. I am unsure how my son perceived it, I have to see what he decides. He also has offers from Northwestern, Louisville and Navy so far, so we'll see how it goes.

Finally got a publishing deal for two novels - Life and Discovering Love. Now I just need to have them professionally edited before submission. At least 1 grand each manuscript. As usual, one step down, a million more to go...But, no complaints.

Sunday, December 09, 2007

Tune In December 13 at 8pm

No Candles Infinity

Join Aisha at 8pm on December 13, 2007 as she discusses

FIRST and ONLY LOVE
and other writing projects and poems on

 LITERARY PIZZAZZ

Tune in at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/literarypizzazz or click link above...