How Many Loves

How many loves does a person get in one life? Do we meet them all, or only if one relationship ends. I guess the first definition necessary is the concept of love. When I speak of love, Im talking about infatuation mixed with anticipation, adoration stirred in. Im talkin about mind spinnin, can't focus on nothin else, must breathe you, inhibit and anticipate you, love. Not the deeper, we been together, got your back down for whatever, boring or exciting, in it to win it love. There is a difference.

It would be a sad thing if we were only afforded that one time, teen young adult love. The one time of total consumption by the feeling because real life hasn't set it. I like to think that God bestows that love on the searching heart at the time in life it is necessary. That He determines we're ready, plants it on us, and watches what we do with the gift. (complete speculation, not biblically based. that would be research and Ive done enough of that today)

There are friends that tell me they have never been in love. I don't believe them. I know its not true. I watched them, in love, but torn, becuase love did not fit the form shaped by Hollywood, Disney and Mama's love stories. I witnessed love dismissed because of their inate inability to not forgive, not trust, not let God step in. Wouldn't it seem just too cruel, to exist on this desolate realm, and never experience the bursting wonder of emotion that is love.....

Why Love?

My fellow poet and blogger, Shai Davis, who shares a middle name, has a wonderful poem on her site Drawn 2 Words. She writes "I keep promising myself I will stop writing about love." Which led me to the question, why do we spend so much time, thought, emotion on love? Yesterday I worked twelve hours, and played Jill Scott the entire day. Two albums consumed my attention for twelve hours, about love.

What is it that captures us? Even after debating politics or the state of our people, discussing the world and life, we always come back to love. No matter how many times I have tried to draft something different, a love related poem springs to my heart, a love based story comes to mind. I am convinced that love is the purity of God, the only emotion that is shocking and comforting, affirming and overwhelming. When we suffer, it is not love, it is the human reaction to or response while in love. Love itself is always pure. And I can't ever get enough.

So I guess we will write on, and dream on, and reminisce about love. Blush, gasp, inhale, exhale and remember loves effects. See there, I feel another poem coming on.....

Pay for Poems?

I'm sick y'all. Examined and verified - its the flu. My body has been aching for the last two days, but yesterday it just shut down. Felt like I was wearing a moon suit, with every step my body felt heavier until I just had to sit down somewhere. I slept from midnight until 7. 7 until noon. Noon until 3. Haven't had this much sleep since undergrad. A bit groggy, but better. Never too sick to blog, though!!

So, a new issue has come up. My fellow writers are expressing concern that I am posting poetry on the net, for free. One respected writer said I shouldn't give away anything for free, much less my writing. I understand that point of view, but I look at it a little different. Hear me out, tell me what you think:

If writing is a God given talent, then, by the simple nature of it being from God, it is given to me to share with the world - edify and uplift (this can lead off into a different discussion about content(godly vs. worldly)-see previous post). If I take the gift, write, but do not distribute based on the condition of money, then I am placing my own barrier against what I was called to do. If it is meant for me to get paid, then I will. I have other things in the works. But I also don't want to die, and have my greatgrands finding all these works that remained barricaded because I couldn't receive payment for them.

So, I post the poems. They're fun to write. I enjoy it. Maybe I will take them down after a month or so. I don't know. They are copyrighted, but I have no problem granting license to use to anybody that requests it. Maybe I'm trippin, but at the end of this life, my measure has to be more than my pocketbook, don't you think?