Love Detached

Can a woman make love, without loving? Is it possible. Can she let a man into her body, whole and full, yet keep a piece of herself separate and untouched. It seems possible, downright easy in theory. To spot a man and lay eyes on his physical. Your mind turns over the possibilities. You don't want much from him, he doesn't even have to talk actually, because it is just a momentary fantasy before you go about your day.

But what happens if you indulge that fantasy. If you take the time to get to know him a little bit, like him a little bit, enjoy him a little bit. If he possesses the qualities to link with your humor, inspire your mind, pique your curiosity, is it already too late? Is uniting simply the final merging of something that a woman has already accepted deep within herself as a mate of sorts, so, no matter what, separation will be painful.

My younger friends don't seem to have this problem. At least, they don't admit to it. One girlfriend in her twenties didn' t seem to have any connection to the men she engaged, she did the deed and kept it rolling. I luv her dearly, but she is what we term "a ho." Not judging, I told her that to her face. We were trained not to be that - this early 30's group of woman friends I have. The ingrained message was to be the opposite of it.

To open your heart and love him and have him love you back. So, I believe, it is hardwired into us now. Making life like my early 20's homegirl impossible for my young but aging 30 something friends. And when one of us does try it, does engage in the meaningless fling, it inevitably turns into "something." Its not just "friendship" sex - I don't know anyone who has been able to pull that off yet (in my age group, I reiterate).

There are exceptions to every rule, but can a women love "detached" like a man...I am beginning to believe that the answer, unfortunately(depending on how you look at it), is no.